captive

this morning i found a beautiful iranian blog.

pedram’s journal

[something like a phenomenon]

"I’m starting to feel a little grown up and I almost feel guilty. I’ve lived on my own before, though never in the city, never without roomates. I actually make myself sit down and study, I give myself enough time to do school work days in advance. Days, as in more than one. I’m making my bed, cleaning my room, taking care of a kitty, making a healthy vegetarian dinner, working part-time, and dusting. Things that seemed once beyond me are so incredibly natural. Of course, I’m analyzing it all in terms of behavioural psychology. When the stakes are high enough, when you actually want something it’s incredible what you suddenly manifest. I was always able to be as I am now, it’s the motivation, drive, and self-control that was missing. Some might think that you’re either born with ambition or you’re born without, then it’s just a simple matter of letting life continue while passive-aggressively taking out your anger and resentment with yourself because you aren’t in control of your fate on others. But that’s fatalist bullshit and there’s nothing more defeating than that." ……

http://pedram.livejournal.com/

see also "if i could borrow our metaphors for a minute"